A Scripture Verse

Jesus said, "Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted", Matthew 5:5, King James Version (Cambridge Edition)

About Our Ministry

Naomi’s Ministry is Christian blog designed to provide encouragement, strength and prayer to individuals who are experiencing loss, grief and recovering from traumatic experiences.

This blog site is to encourage, pray and support persons experiencing a wide range of losses that anyone of us may experience in our lifetime. The parting of a special loved one by death; divorce; the loss of job and financial security; the loss of limb(s) or debilitating illness or disease; the loss of a home or opportunity, are all "losses" and at varying degrees, may catapult you into a grieving cycle or traumatic event. However, we may not be on the road to recovery, if the right resources are not available to give us perspective on our feelings and the changes that happens in one’s life when a loss of any kind occurs. We need courage to grieve and to wait before God for the healing that comes, sometimes, one day at a time.

This is "first" a ministry of encouragement:

Know that what you are going through is normal for anyone who has experienced what you have experienced. Knowing how to go through the process, recognizing when you are grieving and seeking the help you may need will aid in the recovery process.

Know that it is okay that you are hurting. No explanations are needed. Admitting that is a first step toward your recovery. Recovery does not mean that you will forget the one or object of your loss. This also does not mean you will not forget the trauma of your victimization. Emotional healing will allow you to live authentically, freely, victoriously in spite of the event. God wants you to have His Victory through His Son, Jesus Christ who won it on the Cross of Calvary for you and I.

Know that you are not alone. Jesus Christ promised never to leave us or forsake us (The book of Hebrews, chapter 13, verse 5). This promise found in the Holy Scriptures is a promise from the Lord Himself that He is always with us, even during our darkest nights. Jesus also said, “I will not leave you comfortless” (The book of the Gospel of John, chapter 14, verse 18).

Know that “The Comforter will come” (The book of the Gospel of John, chapter 16, verse 7). The Comforter that Jesus Christ is referencing is God the Holy Spirit, (part of the triune Godhead). As you call out to God in faith during this time of tremendous emotional and sometimes physical pain, the Lord will send His Spirit to minister to your mind, body, soul and spirit. He alone can heal the hurts of loss, grief and trauma. The Holy Spirit will wipe away "your tears". Jesus "is willing" to heal you if you but ask and trust Him in the process of recovery.

Know one day you will be able to smile again. The sun will shine in your heart again. You will laugh again. You will have more good days to come. The Lord knows the thoughts and plans he has for us (Jeremiah 29:11), even if you cannot see it in the midst of this defining moment. If you will trust the Lord’s plans for you, you will come through this season, whole and able to continue on in your life’s journey.

Search out a safe and Word-filled church home or fellowship, counselor/support group. God’s Word is the answer. Read Psalms 34, 41, 42, 91, 103, 107, 112, 119, 121, 123, 140, 145. Depending on our needs, we may also need some assistance beyond what a blog, book or cards offer. Professional help is available. Pray and ask the Lord to direct you to a place of healing and confidentiality. Check out the resources at your church or another Christ-centered congregation. Please do not grieve alone.

The time for recovery is NOW. Just like you would go to the hospital’s emergency room if you were physically in need of medical treatment, so during high levels of emotional crisis, you should not wait to seek help or assistance. DON’T WAIT TO GET HELP. This is the time to admit that you are hurting and it is okay.

Keep talking to God the Father, the Father of ALL Comfort. He knows your grief and the journey ahead. Also believe that He loves you even when you are sad. This ministry is reaching out to you with Jesus' love. We are praying for your total healing and recovery.

If you are interested in receiving prayer, please write me at: jesusislord14@outlook.com. Please do not request money - request prayer.

God loves you. We are praying you will feel His love and comfort every time you reach out to read the messages.

Jesus THE SON OF GOD is Lord!


Sister Birdsong

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Winning by losing

Winning by losing is not a new theme. Many of us have experienced a tremendous personal loss just to receive down the road a new blessing in form of a friend, a new job or a renewed perspective. Coaches use this concept to teach and encourage players to "look at lessons learned" in the midst of the loss; good parents train their children to expect to loss sometime in life and to handle it with grace. And yet, in the midst of tremendous personal loss, especially if the path of grief is long, we forget that in each loss, there is something gained.

I don't know why, but the Lord has put many losses in my path. Now that I'm older, I have experienced more death in my family than I can remember when I was younger. Relationships with others change and there is the grief that comes with the loss of that comfort. Even "good grief" is heartily felt as I transition from one place of employment to another. I'm so thankful for the new opportunity to serve; and yet, the goodbye to the "familiar" brings a sort of sad repose in remembering what has passed.

In the last two days I have been meditating on a wonderful scripture that I hope God the Holy Spirit will reveal some comfort to you if you are in the place of grief today.

"Remember ye not the former things, neither consider the things of old. Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth ; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert" Isaiah 43: 18-19.

In order to move on from the place of grief, we have to practice what I will call "selective remembrance". We should remember the good times we experienced with a loved one. We should memorialize the good they did for us and others in the world. If it is a job, we should journal that "lesson learned" and thank God for it in spite of the loss. But we should not linger on any trauma or pain connected to the loss. This takes time of course. But I believe the Lord who is also our healer will heal the mind from hurtful memories if we but ask Him to do so. I truly do not believe that it is healthy to live in the pain of the past. You can get stuck there and so many do not ever come out of it.

Personally, I am learning to pray more about "how to remember" people, events, situations. They say "perspective" is everything and I agree that how you think about or upon a thing can either bring you to despair or to "winning" attitude. I have asked God many times to remove a memory that was doing me "no good". Some memories must be buried with the loss....I mean really, let it go! I decided recently to make a conscious effort to ask God, "how should I see this or that event, situation or relationship"? It is not easy  - but I am finding a strange relief when I receive God's perspective and release my own.

The comfort in the scripture above also tells us that as we let go..God does something new. Wow! That's wonderful. God will always do something new but we have to look for it. My pastor today said these very words in a different kind of way. He said, "If you are ever in a win-lose situation and you are the one losing, look in another direction". I have to say wow again, right here! God is so faithful, He will never let loss destroy us. That is not "His intention". His will is to be with us, comfort us and walk with us as we process the loss so we can find new meaning in the experience of it to comfort and help someone else. God is always up to something "GOOD" for us. He is GOOD. This whole "black and white" thing is just not as "cut and dry" as it appears. Shades of "gray" is the bain of life...things are never what they first appear to be; neither are we....

The other wonderful promise in the scripture is God telling us that He will bring the water and refreshing we need in dry places. Losses of any kind can certainly dry up your joy and a positive outlook. God understands that. He placed a story about a man who lost everything in the Holy Bible. "In the land of Uz there lived a man whose name was Job..." Job 1:1). Job lost his wealth, his children, his friends and his health but God didn't leave him there. God restored ALL that Job lost double-fold. But there was a greater lesson Job gained in the losing and he declares it to God when he says, "My ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you" Job 42:5. Job lost everything but His spiritual eyes saw who God really is. He lost His children, but He didn't lose God. He lost his wealth, but God was still there. He lost his health to the point of gaping, disease-ridden sores, but God was still there. He saw the greatness of God in spite of his losses. He saw the sovereignity of God. He saw God's all-knowing power!

There is a "win" in the losing...Go to God. Let Him comfort you, love you and teach you. He is Still There.

Sunday, May 1, 2011

When you lose a parent

As a writer it is difficult to remember that I am still on a grief recovery journey...Besides encouraging others, it is so important that I continue my grief talk and hopefully in sharing, encouraging others to talk, pray, laugh and cry out their own grief experiences. So after months of not writing on my blog, I am reminded today to talk about grief because another death has occured in my family.

I am amazed at how selective our memory and thoughts are and why it's important to guard our thoughts and not internalize all of the "noise" that is around us; especially in this media age. I learned this past Tuesday that another matriach of the family, a cousin died, Cousin Lucille Dozier who was married to my grandmother's brother. My own grandmother died about a year ago and then her sweet sister, Auntie Ceola died in the winter. The family is planning a reunion for June and I'm not going due to some other commitments. But now more than ever, may be the time to have short reunions with family members to re-connect as family. In the busyness of my work week and then learning some very exciting news and dealing with some "church mess", I finally was reminded on late Thursday, that Cousin Lucille was gone. What a reminder to slow down - the world around us tries to make  us spin and work up a lather of "things to do". However, if you live like this you miss special moments - everything becomes a blur, even the important stuff. Now that I'm quiet enough to hear myself think, I am ready to talk about Cousin Lucille.

In reality, I have not seen her in decades! My selective memory brought me back to my years as a little girl and my sister and I going to Staten Island to visit she and her daughter, Karen. What fun we had in NY! Vivid memories of interest come to mind:

  • The dog poop! Yep, that's what I remember. Cousin Lucille taking us on walks in the city and my having to "look down" to make sure that I did not get my sneakers or sandals (urghh) stuck in "mess". LOL! I hated going outside of the apartment because of the TORMENT of having to watch out for some dog's poop. And can I tell you, there was ALWAYS some dog poop (the whole owner duty to scoop after your pet was not "thang" back then and NY was full of it).
  • I remember the "girlie fights" we cousins got into all the time. We loved and hated each other at the same time...LOL. We would fight the whole time of the visit and then cry to point of hysteria when we had to split up and I and my sister went back to CT. Can I tell how many "extended visits" we had because we girls knew how to cry, moan and just carry on! It was a show, for real.
  • I remember Cousin Lucille's smile and her wavy, sandy brown hair parted in the middle. She was also somewhat shy, not really loud spoken (we had others who "played that family script"), but you had the sense "she could go there if you pushed her".
  • She loved her husband and her children. I know that...she loved us too!
I hope Betsy and the other children and grandchildren visit this site and do some grief talking...I can say for an assurance, that she will be missed because she was a part of my life. Something was planted in that short season of time and her memory is still with me after all these years....

I remember when I lost my father...the first major loss of my life and I still try to touch him and feel him. I see him often in the men I come across in my life after 6 years of being dead. He is in heaven with Jesus now and that always brings me comfort. But I miss him being in the world with me. I always felt "safe" because he was in the world. How I depend on God to fill that terrible void. My father has become larger than life now that he is gone. This week I spoke about him to a co-worker and I talked, and talked and talked. I'm so thankful that my co-worker didn't get "bored"..He let me talk allowing me to "get it out" if you will. When you lose a parent, you lose the model of what you thought "being an adult" would look like...You have to talk about it so you don't lose those precious memories and special moments. I like to talk about the values my father taught me with his life. He wasn't a big talker either. Now I can reflect on the things he wanted to teach me by how he lived his life. Isn't that the greatest message anyay? How you live your life? Isn't that what people remember?

You will be missed Cousin Lucille...and I pray for your family down here and me, and mommy too. Losing a parent is hard to go through...but God is faithful. He is always so faithful. There is no sorrow that "Heaven cannot heal".